1. Roger’s hypothetical faux-slam. Seriously people, he hasn’t won three in a row yet, but you’re already hyping him up for Australia and four in a row, which is being called the completion of a Grand Slam? Some nerve. Martina Navratilova completed the faux-slam but didn’t get credit for it… because it isn’t a grand slam. Grand Slam = all four majors in the calendar year. How come the pundits are unanimously claiming that IF Roger wins the US Open and IF he wins Australia, his four in a row WILL BE as impressive as a real Grand Slam? It ain’t so. And he hasn’t done it, so let’s move on. Please.
2. Clijsters is a mom. And it’s incredible, only two women have won grand slam titles as mothers and her baby is adorable, looks just like her. Even as a Kim fan, I’m tired of hearing about the mom thing on every headline. She’s back, she may well win a grand slam title, as a mother. What’s more interesting is the story we aren’t hearing about: the death of her father Leo Clijsters, from lung cancer last year. I have a feeling that his illness was known to her when she retired. We don’t know, ’cause no one’s asking. ‘Cause she’s a mom.
3. Oudin is the future of American tennis. Might be, probably will be a big factor in years to come. But as Jon Wertheim noted over on his blog, the hype machine is roaring to life on this one, so get ready for a frenetic couple of months (and probably the next year) of relentless stories on America’s Next Top Model..er, Sweetheart. Oudin strikes me as one of those rare breeds, the kind who step up in the face of pressure rather than being beaten down. Even so, she will run into a wall at some point. Then we’ll get “what’s wrong with her” stories that talk incessantly about the media overhyping her.
4. The McEnroe Brothers. “We’re from Queens and isn’t it amazing John/Patrick, us two Queens boys, broadcasting night matches together at the US Open for ESPN! Remember when we used to ride the train in, from Queens, and we’d see that stadium. Even though it wasn’t this stadium, nor was it Forest Hills, it was Forest Meadows, but who’s counting? Two Queens boys, we are… Now here we are. At the US Open. Probably no one out there in TVLand is familiar with the story of the two McEnroe Brothers.” Sock. in. it.
5. Sharapova’s “comeback” instead of “Sharapova’s dicey shoulder.” There is only one commentator getting this one right and it is the venerable Pam Shriver, no stranger to the destructive aftermath of shoulder surgery. To paraphrase Shriver, there is no guarantee Maria gets back in the top 5 if that shoulder won’t hold up. The “comeback” has been going on since May, and as Shriver points out, we’ve seen many comebacks in women’s tennis that have taken half that time. Kim’s is just the most recent. It isn’t Maria’s fault, shoulder surgery strikes terror into the heart of a tennis player. Unlike pitchers who have to pitch only once every four days (and they are not assured of a positive outcome either), tennis players must play for several hours every day, with hundreds of serves. The coming back part is over, now we watch as her career hangs in the balance on a sketchy shoulder.
6. Roddick’s weight loss. I’m hedging on this one because I haven’t minded it too much. It certainly has been the catalyst for his resurgence. But I’m certain that a lot of you cannot stand to hear one more word about this – just like I was ready to take the gas pipe after we spent the last five years of Andre Agassi’s career hearing about his training regimen with Gil Reyes up magic mountain. (There oughta be a way to make With Gil Reyes Up Magic Mountain into a folk song about acid, but alas, that’s not my era.)
7. What’s wrong with Safina: I have no clue. Turn the page. Big Brother Marat was a nut who wasted his considerable gifts, but he was a toad. His sister is not a toad. Like Wertheim, I’m inclined not to pile on. Watching her mentally torture herself is horrible. She may benefit from not being number 1 – but we said that about Jankovic and Ivanovic, too. How’s that working out?
8. Who’s number 1 on the WTA Tour? Serena. Williams. Is. Number. 1. Got it? The rankings don’t reflect it, but let’s acknowledge reality – Serena is number 1, Safina number 1 on paper. Don’t get me wrong, Safina earned the ranking. There’s just no need to bandy this about incessantly. Until the system changes, or Serena decides to try to win non-G.S. tournaments, we’re stuck with this bogus argument. A year from now this may be fascinating, especially if Maria fixes her shoulder, Clijsters is in the mix and Henin is back. Until then.. Serena. Williams. Is. Number. 1.
Honorable mentions: James Blake as a title contender (how’s that working out for you, Brad?), Verdasco’s training with Gil Reyes (referenced repeatedly by yours truly), Rafa’s low expectations (part legit, part sandbagging by Rafa’s camp), The Tennis Channel’s firsts (first night match, first morning show, first time Jimmy Connors has been interesting), shots of someone’s girlfriend during the middle of a point (a losing battle, this one)
Passing Shots 
Posted on September 7, 2009
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